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Friendships can be hard work, but can make you very happy. The first thing to say about friendships is that you can be friends with anyone who likes you. Many people think of disabled people as mixing only with other disabled people but you can hang out with anyone you like.
You can also choose whether you make friends or not. If you feel you are happy without friends, because you enjoy being alone and doing your own thing, then that's all right. It is not all right to be alone because you are afraid of being with others or don't know how to find friends.
Finding a friend is like anything else you do. You have to make an effort and work at it. You have to be a friend to have a friend. Being a friend means helping your friend and treating them how you would want to be treated. Sometimes a friendship goes further and you might find yourself in love. Love means different things to different people. For example, you can love a boyfriend or girlfriend in a different way than you love your parents or carers.
Feelings of love can be powerful and they can surprise you or your partner. Sometimes people who start out as friends can end up feeling much closer.
If it's difficult to talk to your parents about friendships, personal relationships and sex, you might find it easier to talk to someone not so close to you. You can get information about relationships, sexuality and sex from:
- teachers at school
- your doctor
- a voluntary organisation concerned with your disability
- The Contraceptive Education Service Helpline telephone 0845 310 1334
- SPOD (Association to aid the Sexual and Personal Relationships of People with a Disability)
- Community learning disability nurses
- Brook Helpline telephone freephone 0800 0185 023
- genetic counsellors
- Relate counselling for anyone in a relationship.
These websites offer more information on friendships and relationships. You can also get more information from SPOD (Association to Aid the Sexual and Personal Relationships of People with a Disability) on 020 7607 8851. You can also talk to an Additional Needs Personal Adviser about anything of these things.
Disability nowTime to talk sex is the Disability Now's section on relationships and covers the latest news stories
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