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Uncontrolled anger
We all get angry from time-to-time and then, when we have calmed down, reflect on the moment and realise that maybe we overreacted. Anger is a completely normal and usually healthy reaction. For some people though, anger can be a real problem and uncontrolled anger can lead to:
- physical violence
- verbal violence
- prejudice
- malicious gossip
- antisocial behaviour
- sarcasm
- addictions
- withdrawal from people and life
The cause of anger problems
Anger is caused by the way that we react to situations, or something that is troubling us and can include:
- Abuse
- Domestic violence
- Bullying
- Depression/Stress
- Anxiety or worries
- Grief
- Alcohol abuse
- Substance abuse
- Trauma
Don’t lose control
If you do get angry, don't lose control. Taking it out on others never solves anything. Instead, admit to yourself that you are angry and try to figure out why. It helps to talk about your anger with a friend, a parent, teacher, or relative. Once you talk about anger, those bad feelings usually start to go away. Here are some other things you can do when you start to feel angry:
- talk to a friend you can trust
- slowly count to 10 while breathing deeply with your eyes closed
- get or give a hug
- stamp your feet
- punch a pillow or cushion - they can't get hurt and you release the anger
- write about or draw your anger
- play a game
- go for a run
- sing or dance along with your favourite music
- think about something good from your past that you really enjoyed
- take a bike ride or go in-line skating
Don’t know why you’re getting angry?
It's also possible to get angry and not even know why. If that happens, it's helpful to ask yourself some questions.
- Can you remember how you felt just before you got angry?
- Did something happen that made you sad or scared?
- Did you want to hide what you were really feeling with anger?
Some people keep their anger buried deep inside. If you do this, your body will find a way to warn you about the anger; a headache or a stomach ache maybe. You may just feel bad about yourself or start to cry. It's not good to hide or bury your anger, so you should find a way to let it out without hurting yourself or others.
Help lines
- Samaritans – 08457 90 90 90
- Connexions Direct – 080 800 13 2 19
Useful websites
The Samaritans
Samaritans is available 24 hours a day to provide confidential emotional support to anyone feeling in crisis.
WHCM Counselling
Provides counselling for young people feeling depressed, suicidal or angry.
Connexions Direct
Offers information on a wide range of topics as well as confidential advice and practical help.
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